They say that it’s lonely at the top, but for an introverted individual looking for love, this challenge is amplified. Dating as an introvert can feel like a constant uphill battle. In a society where extroversion is prized, being self-conscious and quiet feels like a liability when dating other people. It’s easy to feel like you have to choose between two mutually exclusive paths: staying home on Friday night with Netflix and your cat (or cat-like object) vs. going out into the world of humans and hoping to meet someone special. But in reality, there doesn’t have to be such a dichotomy between your inner and outer selves. You can be happy staying home on Friday nights while actively going out into the world to find love. Here are some tips on how to do so if you are introverted and single.
1. Live authentically
Be who you are. The most important thing you can do while looking for a romantic partner is to be yourself. If you pretend to be someone you aren’t, you’ll never find happiness. If you’re constantly editing your personality to fit in with what someone else wants or expects, you will feel resentful. It can be really challenging to remain true to your authentic self when you’re surrounded by people who are different than you. It can also be incredibly rewarding to live authentically as yourself.
2. Be confident, not confined
Confidence is critical for dating as an introvert. It’s important to know your own worth and to be confident in who you are. But it’s also important not to be confined by your insecurities.
3. Take care of yourself physically
All the stress relief activities in the world won’t help if you aren’t taking care of yourself. Meditation won’t do you any good if you aren’t getting adequate sleep. In fact, when you try to meditate, you might doze off because you aren’t taking care of your body’s need for sleep. Similarly, hitting the gym occasionally won’t relieve much stress if you’re not regularly fueling your body with healthy, nutrient-dense food. You need to take care of your basic needs first if you want your stress relief activities to be effective.
4. Explore Online Dating
As an introvert, you might be inclined to avoid online dating because it means putting yourself out there in a very public way. And this is understandable. But you don’t want to miss out on opportunities because you’re too shy. Using new technologies, websites, and apps, you can push past your shyness and still meet people in a way that feels good to you. As an added bonus, online dating also affords you a level of anonymity. This can be helpful if you have anxiety about going out in public.
5. Focus on building friendships
There is no reason you should be alone. Beyond dating, you should also focus on building friendships. Building new friendships is a really great way to build confidence and find support, and it’s also a great way to meet people. There are a variety of ways you can go about doing this. First, you can try to be in the company of others. Join a club or find other activities that allow you to interact with others. Second, you can make a conscious effort to reach out to people. You can do this in person or online.
6. Let your friends play matchmaker
Your friends will know who you are and what you’re looking for in a mate. They can help you find people to date. You can let your friends know that you’re open to dating. They can help you find people to date and then let you decide if you’re interested or not.
7. Do positive things
Beyond actively trying to meet people, you can also do positive things for yourself. You can focus on improving yourself. This can include anything from joining a book club, learning a new language, or taking up a sport. Doing positive things for yourself will help you feel more confident and assertive. It will also allow you to be more selective with the people you date.
8. Keep your word
And finally, you can keep your word. Dating relationships are built on trust and integrity. If you break your word or are unable to follow through on your commitments, you will lose the trust of others. This will make it harder for you to date. It will also make it harder for you to build friendships. Keep your word. This will make your dating life easier.
Dating as an introvert can be challenging. It can be easy to let your introversion overwhelm you, but it doesn’t have to be that way if you know how to overcome it. Being social doesn’t mean you have to give up your introverted nature, but you just have to learn how to manage it. If you can learn to balance your introverted and extroverted traits, you can enjoy dating and eventually find a romantic partner. Being brave and putting yourself out there is key. It may take some time, but when you find the right partner, you’ll know it.